Since announcing the relaunch of my book - my inbox has been flooded with encouraging responses about the vulnerability it took to make my needs and goals clear in this season.

If I'm brutally honest, I'm still shaking in my boots because while I know I need help, I'm not used to "putting myself out there." I'm second-guessing myself with questions like:

• What happens if I don't hit my goal by January?
• How embarrassing would it be if nobody buys a single book?
• What if someone buys the book, hates it, AND leaves a terrible review?

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Trust me, I'm giving you 3 of the 10,000 questions that keep me up at night. However, I remembered a post from Luvvie Ajayi Jones on LinkedIn and Instagram about asking for help. She said:

I know that I am not the only one who needs something in this season so I want to help you help yourself -- here are 6 steps to prepare for and ask for help:

6 Steps to Prepare for and Ask for Help

1. Identify Your Need: “Clarity is Key”

Take time to identify what kind of help you need clearly. Be specific about the task, project, or situation you’re facing. Evaluate what resources you already have and where the gaps lie. This will help you articulate your needs more precisely. Be clear about what you hope to achieve by asking for help. This will ensure that both you and the person you’re asking are on the same page.

Ambiguous asks are hard to fufill. FOr example, many times when I'm coaching a professional who is on the job market, they will tell their network something like, "Well, if you hear of anything -- please let me know!"

However, that ask should sound more like, "I'm currently on the hunt for a Director of Commerical Marketing role in FinTech - If you know any hiring managers in FInTech or people doing similar work who would be willing to speak with me, I'd greatly appreciate an introduction."

2. Choose the Right Person: “The Right Fit Matters”

Think about who in your network has the skills, experience, or resources to help you. Make sure the person you’re approaching has the time and capacity to offer assistance. Choose someone who you believe will be receptive and supportive of your request.

I have a chapter in my book titled "Relationships are still everything" - it's my favorite chapter! It breaks down the key relationships you need in your career and how to build your personal and professional board of directors. This is the time to lean into your teachers, mentors, and sponsors for introductions OR so they can serve as your helpers.

3. Make the Ask: “Be Direct and Gracious”

Explain your situation and what you need help with in a straightforward manner. Let the person know how much you appreciate their time and consideration. If appropriate, offer to help them in return in the future. This demonstrates a willingness to contribute and build a mutually supportive relationship. However, don't be afraid to ask if you don't have anything to immeditaely reciprocate -- sometimes it may take time to uncover what someone may need.

4. Prepare for Objections: “Anticipate and Address”

Think about any reasons why the person might hesitate to help and be prepared to address them. Assure them that you value their time and will be respectful of their boundaries. Be willing to negotiate or adjust your request if necessary.

Maybe they can't meet 100% of your ask, but they can give you a solid 60%! That's still something.

With this relaunch of my book, I know many people may not be able to invest in one of the career transformation bundles that gives 3, 10, 25, 100, or 500+ books. However, that doesn't mean that they can't purchase 1 book for themselves and share it with a friend.

Many professionals in my network purchased copies of the book years ago, so now they've reached out to facilitate introductions to their human resources team, manager, or their company's ERG group. That's still a HUGE win!

5. Follow Up and Express Gratitude: “Close the Loop”

After receiving help, express your sincere gratitude in writing or in person. Let the person know how their help has impacted you and the progress you’ve made. Continue to nurture the relationship and look for opportunities to reciprocate in the future.

When someone extends a helping hand, one of the ways your repay them is by saying "thank you" and keeping them in the loop on your progress. It doesn't feel good when, months later, they are wondering, "I wonder what happened with....?"

6. Learn from the Experience: “Growth Mindset”

Consider what went well and what could be improved for future requests. Recognize that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Each time you ask for help and receive it, you build your confidence and resilience.

And remember -- confidence comes from taking action!​
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Until next time,

KIMBERLY BROWN Career + Leadership Expert Founder, Brown Leadership™

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